PREPARING FOR CHANGE

Vivi-Mari Carpelan: "Deep Waters", handmade collage with artist's photographs,
copyright 2012

I felt that my blog was looking a bit tired and that I really needed to change the look as well as the description. I don't post very often these days, as my life has become more focused on the arts than on spiritual matters. My world view hasn't changed that much, but maybe my perspective has - rather than trying to look at life from above, I seem to be observing life from the ground up while working on a grass root's level. It's difficult to find words for this change of priorities. I guess it's really about being increasingly less theoretical and more practical about living life in a meaningful way. 

I haven't felt very spiritual, to be quite honest. I believe that once you have understood some of life's fundamental "truths" in a way that satisfies your soul, there is no turning back. So while I may feel less spiritual it could be an illusion that only means that I am more interested in the life we live here and now, in questions surrounding a true integration into society without the sacrifice of one's true self (putting the "being in the world but not the world" into practice), and what sort of work is truly useful at this time in history. I believe that one's purpose in life as well as the way in which one needs to manifest this purpose can be quite surprising and unorthodox. For instance, some people might wonder why I dwell on negative issues through my art while I personally feel that I need to talk about serious matters in a way that reaches the greatest audience. Most people need rather graphic examples of life's issues in order to start thinking about them. I want to break out of any club of mutual admiration, and reach across to new audiences if possible. My health is not good, and I struggle to find new ways of dealing with it, but also of using it as part of my communication with others. I'm also busy focusing on the kind of life I would truly like to have, as I feel that knowing and understanding bad health, poverty and other issues related to limitations and lack has had its days... Perhaps I'll talk more about this some other time. When things have been stagnated for a while, change is usually behind the door!

This blog has been running now for over four years, and I have reached a lot of people. I have every reason to be happy about the fact that so many people have come here in spite of my shortcomings in regards to advertising and interaction. My most popular post, i.e. the one dealing with a subject matter that people search for online a lot, is the one about dissolving the ego. Personally, I have stopped worrying about my ego... ok well I do worry a bit. But now that I'm in a meaningful relationship, I already have so many issues to deal with that dwelling on such basic spiritual issues seem a bit pointless. Take one thing at a time... be patient... one day it will all make sense and the mundane and the spiritual will come together in a new form. That's my feeling at this point in time.

Artwork: "Xistential", mixed media collage with artist's photograph, copyright Vivi-Mari Carpelan 2012