What Secret?

I suppose that the craze surrounding the book and film The Secret is wearing off, but I still feel like presenting a few thoughts about the whole thing. When it came out, I went online and looked at the movie trailor and the author's website - at least I think it was her. I didn't like the hyped up energy and the way the woman in question was fixated on money. "I became a millionaire, and then a billionaire - all thanks to The Secret" I recall being her statement. Well yes... a nicely wrapped up ultra positive New Age book that encourages people to catch at a straw in a world full of stress and uncertainty is likely to get a lot of buyers. It screamed sensationalism to me. Anyway, I finally got a chance to get the book out of the library as it had been translated to Swedish. I was curious to see what exactly is in it, though I had a hunch from the very start that there was nothing that special about the concept of the law of attraction. Here is what I think.

First of all, notice that the message is packaged in a romantic sort of way that is sure to appeal to a lot of people. It reminds me of The Da Vinci Code. One thing that immediately struck me as phoney was the way the author makes references to people of the past and claims that they all knew about the secret. Where is the evidence? There is none. All that you get are some very obscure quotes by some of the people listed (Einstein, Emerson and so on) that tell you absolutely nothing and that probably were retracted from a context that had nothing to do with the message of this book. She also claims that all these famous thinkers and scientists owed their success to knowing the secret. In other words, they believed their way to success. Come on! It sure takes a bit of talent and education as well! Really! The book is really talking to us as if we are children who need to be convinced that the author knows what she's talking about and we have no right to contest this because we're somehow lesser knowing. Another thing that made me raise my eyebrows was the loose way of using the term "Spirit". The author claims that spirit is like the genie in the bottle, all ready and prepared to fulfil all of your most ardent wishes. Later on there is some talk about humans really being equal to God and thus in the position of creating the reality they want, but it's really not very good literature. Spirit as I understand it is way beyond our comprehension and certainly a very active part of existance, rather than a passive force that a human ego can control and demand.

I was a bit taken aback that the universe was likened to a postorder catalogue. All you have to do is choose your wish and send out the order. While I don't necessarily object to the profanity of the metaphor, I do think that it brings down a very complex process to a very banal level. What I feel is that there is nothing all that wrong with the concept about the law of attraction per se, the problem is that it's only representing a narrow scope of reality. Perhaps it does act as an eye opener to people who have never thought in terms of spiritual "truths" before. What I see as problematic is that people usually get stuck on the most obvious statements of this truth such as "abundance is your birthright" and "you must only think positive thoughts and make sure you're state of mind is always one of happiness and well being". These act as life buoys in an uncertain world and tend to freeze into dogmas. I have met people online who have been very eager to push these "truths" onto me although it actually does state in the book that you must never do that as it's only serving the ego. Other people have been very depressed because they failed to manifest their wishes and feel very guilty that they have negative thoughts. What I see as a big danger apart from egoistic self-gratification is severe self-blame! It actually does say in the book that you should embrace all of your feelings but it's not really coming out that clearly. The overshadowing statement is basically that you must not give into negative or doubtful thinking and feeling (this is being repeated many times though in fact there is a passage saying that one positive thought will outrule many negative ones...). This is a ticket to a very hyped up sort of positivity that is likely to undermine the work a person might be doing in order to attract what they want. You cannot command your subconscioius, negative undercurrents to disappear magically!

The bottomline is; you cannot make certain negative tendencies go away just by thinking positive thoughts. And what I really want to stress is that there is no short cut to deep insight and wisdom. I myself am the first to admit that I only learn the hard way! I simply cannot imagine myself going around faking my inner life to sound like a prayer wheel of repetitive, lovey dovey thoughts and feelings that are only about the wonderful things I have in this moment. "I have a lot of money, I have the perfect partner, I have perfect health..." are examples of the sort of affirmations that were actually very popular back in the early 1990s already. If it works for some; fine... obviously everyone must do what they feel is working for them. I just think that it would require an easily suggestive mind in order to work, and that it would feel highly unnatural. This is only my personal opinion, of course!

I think that a big problem with this sort of thinking is also the idea that all we need to do is know what we want and then ask for it. I believe that we rarely know what we truly need, and that this is way more important than wanting things. Of course, some people are here on Earth with a purpose of discovering ways in which they can attain a higher level of happiness and success, but if you're on a serious spiritual path I really don't see "wanting" as very relevant. I like to believe that I am always guided by the more higher spiritual part of me, and so whatever comes my way is there as a challenge that helps me gain a higher level of wisdom. I don't think we learn much of any value from a very easy life. If this was the case, we would probably not be on Earth, but in some other realm where there are less opportunities to experience the friction between polarities. Every dilemma that I manage to solve leaves me feeling more accomplished, and this is a deep experience that has little to do with the puny "little" self, the ego. Of course there is always the option of using spiritual insight as a way of growing the ego, but I think that the more humbled you are by life and the incredibly complex forces at work, the less likely you are to want that. I have to say that it wasn't long ago that I had an experience of surrendering part of my will to Spirit and it caused a surge of Kundalini (a strong energy current) in me.

I think that claiming that you can keep your weight only by thinking that you have your perfect weight is a bit strange. I understand the concept, and maybe it does work for some. In my case my weight depends on what I eat and how much I exercise. To manically focus on keeping it is not really my thing. I also have to say that I got through University because I believed I would. But I also got through it because it was quite important in terms of my self-esteem and my life's purpose. Manifesting something like that "just because" doesn't make any sense to me. There are also lots of people who believe they have tons of money and end up heavily indebted. Of course, if you really did what The Secret tells you would also make sure that you don't believe in being indebted or somehow change your energetic frequency to match a state of true abundance. But really... we can certainly try but how realistic is it that we would be able to juggle with so many elements that are actually subconscious, for the most part? Better, methinks, to just take a step at a time and see how things really work out on this level of reality..?

I also like to stress that people do need to talk about their own hardships, and not keep it all to themselves as The Secret suggests. It's simply very bad psychology! Dwelling on negative things incessantly is a different issue... still there's a time for everything. You also cannot force feelings of love so all the imperative talk about having to feel massive amounts of love all the time is not realistic either. First and foremost, be kind to yourself!

Some time ago I met someone who really fancied me. It seemed that I represented all the things that this guy had asked for (he confessed to having pleaded to the universe). However, there were other things there as well: I also brought a host of challenges into this guy's life. In the end he refused the good as well as the bad and went back to a more comfortable lifestyle. Perhaps I was a manifestation in this person's life? The thing is, that could very well be the case because we certainly are not islands and so oftentimes we act out a role that someone else is needing to experience. I'm sure I learnt important lessons from all this myself. But this person obviously didn't really know what he wanted, and so the scenario had to collapse. I also don't want to pretend to know exactly what was really involved in the drama. Only time and deep contemplation may reveal some of the reasons behind the encounter, but some of it may remain embedded in the unconscious forever. All I can do is try and do the right thing, which in my vocabulary means being intuitive and following thoughts and feelings with utter attention and discernment.

I also wish to give another example of the complexity of life. I became friends with a very nice woman in the spring and was hopeful about the contact. One day she texted me something very short and dismissive. I was quite hurt, and didn't hear from her all summer. Recently I deleted her from my list of Facebook friends. Suddenly I received a sincere apology from her. She was asking to be my friend and explained what exactly had happened. There was no reason for me not to accept the apology and so there is a chance that we will be able to carry on our deep conversations. But the point is; I didn't manifest her return, in fact I had negative thoughts about her. There was no direct law of attraction implied other than that me taking a decisive step made her realize that she was attracted enough to our friendship so as not to let it go!

Finally, I want to say that I think the law of attraction is really quite common sense (don't most of all realize already that we attract certain things into our lives depending on who we are?) and not some hushhush "secret"! Perhaps it's just me but I really like to live life in a natural way. To me it does not mean living an unconscious zombie like existance (cf. the state preceding the awakening suggested by The Secret), but being attentive to all that goes on inside and outside of me. It's relaxing into the real me the way this "me" is manifested by Spirit in this time and place. I don't want to control my environment or make other people become something that I want through some idea about manifesting the perfect people to surround you with. It's not easy, but that's my personal challenge.

Photo by author, all rights reserved 2009

Spiritual Transition

I wish to say a few words about spiritual transition. My own experience is that a kind of dark night of the soul is inevitable before something can open up within (see a previous post). You may have worked with yourself for a long time but at some point you're starting to feel weary. Nothing inspires you anymore. It may provoke a severe feeling of anxiety. You will most likely start to feel even more separated from other people and this, depending on your basic constitution, will feel truly horrifying. When you look back you realize that all your attempts at connecting with others have been futile. Now, to make matters worse, people start to drop out of your life. Maybe they don't recognize who you are anymore and may start to shun you. If you feel that this may be the case, it's not a nice feeling and pretty taxing on your sense of self! Some people truly don't fit into the new you that is in transition, as you don't inhabit the same energetic space as them anymore. Some may deep down feel envious of changes in you that they perceive ever so slightly. If you radiate more light then that could disturb other people who might feel inferior in some ways. However, speculating about this may lead you nowhere. Whatever the facts surrounding the loss of people and opportunities, what is certainly true is that a lot of weird stuff keep popping out of the depths of your being and you hardly even recognize yourself anymore! Chances are that you are a kind person, maybe cheerful even, but that doesn't seem to stand through anymore - you question your own self. This is not a bad thing, though, because you need to be open to a new version of you. You may not be going crazy. When you start to feel the true symptom of the dark night of the soul you will not only feel separated from the higher truth ("God" if you will), you will also feel separated from other people. In addition, you will attract odd characters who mirror the issues you still have, and so rather than feel bitter it's more constructive to see them as catalysts or teachers. Remember that they are attracted to you too, for whatever reason. I wouldn't recommend worrying too much about this, instead try and find ways of dealing with it that help to empower you in a good way - any way that helps you become more self-reliant is good because it brings you closer to the real you. Learning to say NO to people and things is a vital part of this process, as it's connected to the idea of resisting temptations along the same lines as the trials that Jesus and Buddha went through!

The horror that you may be experiencing is an existential angst that settles in your body in the form of a taught sensation as well as unpleasant phases of rather extreme anxiety. Because of going through deep inner change, you will also feel very vulnerable and open and other people will either misunderstand you, take advantage of your openness so as to feel superior themselves, or simply cause you to hurt because there is something in the connection that you are supposed to learn from. To bash oneself because one is attracting negative things is not useful in my opinion. This phase may last for a long time. It all depends how much change you can handle. Sometimes a sensitive person like myself also has to deal with physical issues such as fibromyalgia and the like, and this may slow down the process. It's best to try and honor this, relax and rest as much as possible. You just might be going through a major spiritual transition... it will be taxing on every level of your "old self" (physical, emotional, mental...). Don't worry; if all this is going on while you suspect it's a spiritual transition, it's certainly more real than talking yourself into it in some way. Fluttering around in a world of love and light may not get you this far. You may feel immersed in negativity but that's because you're releasing any that you still harbor in the depths of your subconscious mind. I'd recommend trying to accept it for what it is and focus on change for the better. It's in the nature of this predicament not change by force of will alone. However, the more you try to tune into the surrender to spirit, the better. It may seem like the last thing to do, and you won't do it because someone tells you to. You will because you've come to the conclusion that it's the only solution. But Rome wasn't built in a day... so hang in there and try to make the best of the situation.

I have good news, though. If this is indeed what you're going through and doctors are not able to find anything substantially wrong with you, then there will be a day when the Kundalini will wake up. It's a partially dormant energy of creation that starts at the very beginning of your spine (I suggest that people look it up if they are not familiar with this concept). You might be feeling something "going on" in your heart and your belly. Maybe you're thinking that the anxiety is giving way. You will have thoughts about the surrender of the ego to spirit. I can't tell you what exactly you will be thinking as it depends on who you are. You might have experienced some huge emotional break down including a lot of crying and very potent feelings of giving up on some pursuits that you have been very serious about. This is the key but not something you can conjure up yourself. It comes when you're ready. The whole point is that somehow, you've been able to get around the little self's desire to be in charge. It's solving a catch22, or maybe even a whole serious of them; attitudes, ideals and pursuits that you've been entangled in. That's when you will have an inner movement that will clear out a lot of the old psychopathological garbage that you no longer need (false attitudes, false pursuits, focusing on the wrong things in your life, and so on). It begins at the very end of your spine so that's how you know it's the Kundalini.

I would suggest, however, that you really set your priorities straight first. There are many distractions that will keep you in a state of struggle and suffering. In my experience you must choose to serve spirit and forget about any other pursuits such as finding the perfect partner or becoming rich. One Kundalini experience or ten may also not bring the ultimate clearance. Many people think they are enlightened because they got through one major obstacle in their life. What they don't realize is that it may not have been the only one and that one or more really serious ones may still lie ahead if they are willing to allow it. However this is all individual. There is no guidebook that one can follow. This post is only meant to help people be aware of what is possibly going on in their lives and to be open to all of it. Good luck!

Artwork: Digital Photograph by author, all rights reserved 2009

Bed of Nails - Relaaax... and Pick Your Nails!

What's the point in bringing out my point of view when it's all so very relative and this persona was created for this life's purposes only? And who really cares about your journey other than yourself? Many certainly pretend to care but their eager advice usually serves a selfish purpose; one thing that you get for free is unsolicited advice, and an abundance of it. Love and genuine concern (which for instance may take the form of authentic sharing and the abolishing of secrecy) is not as easy to come by.

At times one is engrossed in one's dramas, at times it all seems futile and transience is more than obvious! Well, in any case it's a very compelling reality and knowing what turn to take and how to manoeuvre the car can put ants in your head. Rather than seeking change as I always have I try and keep things simple so as to protect myself from the very familiar feelings of being overwhelmed. And I try and stay away from people because I simple cannot understand why some people want stuff from me and others seem as if they wouldn't touch me with a barge pole. And of course; some people are just nice in a comfortable sort of way. But I'm tired of trying to figure it all out. The whole issue of manifesting a better life is also a bit too complex right now so I just try not to worry my head too much. I assume that my purpose is what it always has been, I just have to regain some physical, emotional and spiritual strength. It takes a bit because so many unexpected and weird ego issues have plagued me for a while.

Life is like a bed of nails which is initially painful but often pleasant once you've relaxed and let it happen. The trick is to overcome the fear of the pain. The repition which is so typical of this reality is for better and for worse. It can obviously be made to work for you but sometimes it takes time. Goodness, we are all so very different. There are no rules to go by that would apply to all of us.

The other day I was wondering if witnessing my own self and witnessing people around me is any different?

I noticed that people in other countries may not know about the acupressure mats or "bed of nails" that have now spread around the Nordic countries. I can certainly recommend it, as I sleep better if I lie on it before bed. My back and neck have been more sore than usual this month. Mine is called "Shakti" and has these white round plastic pieces that you lie on. Others look different. I suggest people look it up on the internet as they do sell them online and also give instructions in English. It seems to me a rather simple way of helping yourself. Whether it really activates the acupoints or simply stimulates the blood flow is of little consequence as long as it helps you relax. Good luck!

Relaaax... and pick your nails!

Photo: "Relaaaaax... and pick your nails!", copyrighted by author 2009

Avoiding Spiritual Elitism In Favour of Love

As I was reading the excerpt that accompanied Karen Bishop's latest energy alert I was a little taken a back - this time it was all about how people moving into higher frequencies will want to avoid the lower ones. The rest of the alert did in fact hit home as usual - there are many contradictions at play on the energetic level right now(check it out at

www.whatsuponplanetearth.com/latest.htm).

Anyhow, I got to thinking about this thing about avoidance. I understand KB's point but I think it could use some elaboration. Very often, people talk about how they don't respond to anger or they don't want to be close to such and such because this person drains them or whatever. It's all very well but this sort of talk sometimes has an aura of snobbism/spiritual elitism about it that I feel quite sad about. Who wants to hear that they are toxic - who wants to feel avoided? Then it occurred to me, that there are two ways in which to react in this manner; there is the high way and the low way. So my suggestion is that we examine the reasons why we feel repelled by certain people or things before lashing out at them. Again there are two options: you may not want to face the shadow issues that a certain person or situation is triggering in you, thus it is a case of denial which will certainly not be buried and forgotten. The other reason is very simply that you cannot relate to the lower energy anymore. Truth to say I find this latter one a bit difficult to fathom as I think that a fully enlightened person would have nothing to fear and would thus not have a need to 'stay away'. On our journey, however, I can understand that such feelings and experiences might occur. I truly believe that these are issues worth considering with great thought since we are supposed to be in this together - yes, TOGETHER!

It seems that there's a gray scale from impersonal to personal that matches our mirroring/learning processes. I am assuming that everything we encounter in the world is a mirror of sorts. So the confusing energies in a mall or massmeeting would be somewhat different thing to deal with than a confrontation with someone on an internet site (more or less semi-personal, for the most part) or the argument with a beloved/close person. Whereas it may be annoying for others to be around someone who's fussy about public energies, I presume it's usually easier to solve than hearing personal accusations about how we 'always' drain so and so because they "have" to read our "negative" comments on a site - yes, someone actually said this to me recently and I wondered, why does this person read my stuff if it "sucks her dry" and how can they throw an unspecific point about "negativity" in my face that is totally meaningless, let alone helpful! It's interesting what people feel they can throw at you on the internet, not having to take responsibility for the consequences. In any case, going up the ladder there are the cases in which people are obliged to deal with us for instance through work, or by encountering us within the family, and these are obviously the more tricky situations that should normally force us to take more responsibility for our actions. I admit when I was writing this blog I was mostly thinking of confrontations that concern other people's feelings.

After all, everyone's point of view is subjective so why go out and make it into an objective truth that would hurt others? I would put grace and discretion at the top of my list though I can't claim to be there myself yet (but I try). Some people just do this avoidance thing out of habit and a mental picture of the situation - I'd say in this case, ego rules. If you do it with a true sense of respect and kindness for those who are less fortunate/wise, juvenile or whatever, you can surely not go wrong... See what I mean? I myself find this thing very difficult to deal with so by no means am I an expert myself. It's not my place to say whether someone's choices are good ones, but my point is that we should try and be really sure of who and what we want to be. I've just noticed that other people's view of myself varies dramatically from person to person. That certainly speaks volumes to me!

I don't really think we can ever bypass the fact that our perception is subjective and so all our explanations are too, nor that everything mirrors our perception in one way or another. This would be the reason we, and only we, can take responsibility for our own perception. Yes? It doesn't mean that nobody else is concerned, of course, but primarily reality comes into being through us, ourselves.

To be accepted for who we are is crucial no matter what stage we are at, then it's another matter altogether whether we feel we can be around that person or not... I myself had to make a change on the relationship arena, I think that besides the general state of the energies, this relationship was contributing to a lot of my anxiety. It was tough because I feel so incredibly sorry for this person, but I had to... It happened just on the day KB said a change would occur for many of us though I didn't know it at that point. So I myself had to make a choice in which I still accept and love a person but I just can't be tied to them.

I see a peril in talking about energies in an elitist way that discounts the struggles some people have either because of the automatic workings of karma or challenges they have taken on in order to better understand humanity. Substitute "high frequencies" with "arian" and you have... you know what. However, I do recoqnize that now is a time to focus on our own well-being so that we can become stronger and better light workers in a world that is in an obvious state of confusion and chaos. All I'm asking is that we consider what our ultimate intentions truly are. Consider this: are all those who speak of oneness and unconditional love truly an example for others to follow?

Is there a point in time when we can really let go of watching ego-issues? It seems to me, that there are always ego-traps and the further we progress, the easier it may be to self-delude in some way, because we think ok, "I am now this and that, I am that I am for sure, so therefore I cannot have an ego-issue" - ah, ever more explanations to resort to! But can we be really sure that we have gained the level or status or whatever of an enlightened person who has no more ego-issues? How can we know our subconscious mind is empty? When are we truly authentic?

I would also like to point out that when we feel superior to another being and not willing to engage in closer contact with them due to their 'toxic' energies, there is always someone more evolved/superior to us who might find US rather undeveloped and naive or something to that effect... (most likely not judgmental though, if they are really far on their spiritual path). It is a very human trait to believe that we (me or a group of like-minded people) are at this moment at the height of evolution - even history can prove that. I also admit that I sometimes catch myself thinking that I can't put up with some "childish BS" (to borrow a line that was delivered to me today), but it is nonetheless not the kind of judgmental person I'd like to be! Besides, there is no way that we can truly determine where we or anyone else is at on their evolutionary chart, we are way too complex for that - and maybe way more complex than we can even imagine. Everything in this universe is surely relative. It is my belief that unconditional love can only exist when these truths have been firmly anchored in our consciousness. Where is your mind at today? ;-)

Post Scriptum: I think that all the varied opinions that my blog provoked already shows that this truly is an issue of a complexity and magnitude that needs attention and deep analysis. We can basically concieve of the idea of taking care of ourselves so as not to get dragged down into lower frequencies fairly easily (something I myself was warned against by an external source, and though I don't know if the source was for real an authority in the field it did make sense - the reason being that I am more of an empath than I actually realized myself). But putting this into practice or living the truth is not that easy. Since many of us are not 'there' yet ('there' a place where there is nothing more to fear, embracing unconditonal love with no more ego traps), we are still prone to judgmental thinking and so if something feels bad there is the instant label of 'toxic' or 'negative' or whatever. This is a subjective perception, of course, but I feel that people don't always remember or realize that. And so they usually also express their dislike. Now it seems innocent enough when it comes to mass gatherings and other chaotic places, but when it comes to people we are in touch with it would surely be a spiritual act to show some heartfelt respect for the level this person is on even if you don't wish to dwell there for long? No one can really know what's going on with someone else, so why assume anything - PLUS make someone feel bad??? Ego is always around somewhere and thus elitism is too. I have heard some horrifying viewpoints at times that sounded downright fascist (such as 'there will be a Darwinian selection of the healthiest and spritually fittest'). And yes, as you're suggesting, ego can also show as an excessive need (note that this is hard to point at objectively though) to reform and act as a missionary. I personally have a tendency to being a martyr though I don't think I'm a missionary - just as an example of various scenarious that I assume we all have.

Artwork: "Encounter Engenders Life", mixed media on paper by author 1998, all rights reserved